03 Jan
A Decision to Try


Over a year ago, I walked and prayed in a labyrinth in our local park. It was a season of change and transition when I desperately needed direction and discernment. I asked over and over, day after day, "Who is my congregation?" God already told me I was to serve, but the formation of boundaries, shape, and the why/who questions remained. 

As the path twisted and turned upon itself, I felt the Lord say, "You're asking the wrong question." So, I flipped the script. "Okay… Where is my congregation?" The new question (and answer!) landed me in a place I didn't anticipate. I immediately sensed God's answer: "On their phones." 

I knew this was true, and I had no idea what in the world I could possibly do with the information. 

Fast forward to today, where I'm feeling vulnerable twinges, apprehension, and insecurity… very much like those dreams where you're giving a speech in class only to realize you're standing in front of everyone, naked. Following God, especially into new and uncharted things, is risky business—or at least, it feels like it. It feels lonely and isolating, and I often ask, "Is any of this working??" 

I sat at my desk this morning, in an office I rarely occupy (because my job is 100% hands-on, and that looks like joining others in their living rooms), and prayed. When I looked up, this quote greeted me cheerfully: "Every accomplishment begins with a decision to try." (Edward T. Kelly) 

Thick with an awareness of the Holy Spirit, here with me even in the banality of office life and internal skepticism, I laughed—and the feelings broke like a fever. There's no guarantee of success, but I will choose to try every time because refusing to try means defaulting to failure. 

Somehow, God got through to me in these words offered by another human, printed in black and white. Somehow, I know these words I type hold power when caught by the wind of God. May you find life, encouragement, peace, and inspiration in the people and world around you. May you grow in confidence that you hear him, too.

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